By a Western Practitioner. October 8th 2017.
Since embarking on my cultivation journey 8 years ago I have experienced countless ups and downs and I would like to share some experiences that I have gone through during the last year or so.
Last summer I decided to become more diligent in my cultivation again and I resolved to work harder on improving my xinxing. I tried to put more of my heart into all my actions at home and at work and as a consequence I experienced that my level rose gradually in other dimensions. I tried to be more patient with my dear practitioner wife no matter whether she was right or wrong and I tried to be more alert whenever xinxing tests occurred. Benevolent Master showed me some scenes to encourage me at times. For example, once I could see myself being pulled up to a higher floor through a hole in the roof inside a high building. I noticed that I was approaching the top floor of the building. I even felt guilty sometimes as I felt that benevolent Master did all of the hard work for me and I didn´t really deserve all His help.
One day I had a vision where I reached the last step on a staircase leading to the top of a mountain. The last step was very high so I rolled up on top of the mountain on my stomach. There were loudspeakers installed at the top stair which sent out interfering sounds which I believe became bad thoughts in my mind. There was an angry being watching the top of the mountain. I believe he was my highest assistant spirit. He threatened to punish me if I touched the loudspeakers. After crawling up on top of the mountain I slowly got up on my feet and I met some practitioners there to whom I was supposed to share my experiences.
Later on I went on a trip with some relatives. When I laid down on the bed in the hotel room I had a dream that I was in the Falun city in a very high building. As I looked out of the window I felt dizzy due to the very high altitude. There was a woman showing me the level I was at. The next moment she turned into a sex demon and attacked me viciously. I realized that I had ascended to a higher level and the first test at that level was the lust demon. Later on I tried to send forth righteous thoughts and I fired my Fa weapons toward the new level but my weapons could not reach that high. Later on I saw myself stumbling and taking a fall. Benevolent Master says in Chapter 6 in Zhuan Falun concerning the lust demon:
” This form of interference comes from the demons or from the master who transforms an object into another to test you. Both forms exist because everyone should pass this ordeal. We begin cultivation as ordinary people, and such an ordeal is the first step. Every practitioner will experience it.”
After that experience my cultivation state wasn´t very good and I didn´t do very well at work or at home and the conflicts piled up because my heart wasn´t righteous enough. This pattern has repeated throughout all my cultivation process. Whenever I reach a higher level I feel quite uneasy for a while until I start to raise myself up in that new dimension. One day I had a sudden idea to write an article about Shen Yun and I sent my article to some alternative news channels. Shen Yun had been slandered in sponsored articles published by the CCP in many western news outlets at the beginning of 2017. I figured that it was a good chance to expose its evil nature to more western people. My article was published in three different news outlets and many people read the article. After the publication of my article I meditated when I suddenly heard a loud booming voice in another dimension that said: “Now you are full(as if after a big meal)!”. I jerked out of fear from the loud voice but then I felt very comfortable. I believe that many sentient beings had been saved by benevolent Master due to my article.
A short while after that a practitioner with her third eye open remarked to me that she could see that I still had a root attachment to supernormal abilities. I was a bit shocked by her words but I decided to look within and sure enough I realized that my wish to look at Kung Fu movies when I wanted to relax contained a hidden attachment to supernormal abilities. I SFRT and when I suddenly reached a wondrous state where I found my root attachment and disintegrated it while feeling wondrous in my whole body.
Later on I could see a high building where the building roof was exploded open. For the first time I had come out of the high building where I had been stuck for such a long time. My understanding at the time was that I had gone beyond the cultivation arrangements of the old forces which represented the high building. I felt very comfortable and satisfied with my cultivation process at that moment. Later on we went to France to see three Shen Yun shows and we bought first class tickets to all three shows. My state was very powerful during the first two shows and I enlightened to many new Fa truths during the shows. I also realised my own attachment to distrust of benevolent Master´s boundless wisdom when I had certain doubts about the effectiveness of the song lyrics to save the audience members. As soon as I noticed my deviant thought I SFRT to eliminate it and tried to play a good role in assisting benevolent Master in His work to save more sentient beings.
When we went back from France I could see my level rising quickly in another dimension and I received a “river of water(symbolizing lives and truths at my level of understanding)” in another dimension. I felt as if I had entered into a completely new and wondrous realm.
Since then I have strived to improve myself further and go even higher but it hasn´t been easy at all. I helped to arrange two art exhibitions during the spring and the summer. During the exhibitions I realized that I had an attachment to putting high expectations on fellow practitioners. I noticed that some practitioners were attached to self-cultivation more than saving sentient beings and I felt unhappy and complained in my heart about these practitioners. Soon I realized that this was a test for my tolerance of others and it´s normal that different practitioners have different levels and origins and hence do things in very different ways.
I also enlightened that it´s natural that practitioners have different understandings of the urgency to save more sentient beings. After the exhibition I tried to share with a veteran practitioner about the attachments I had noticed in him during the exhibition and I realized that while he agreed with me on the surface he didn´t want to fix those problems in his heart. For instance, I shared with him about the importance of sitting in double Lotus and he agreed with me but still complained about his pain in his legs. Later on he was still sitting in half Lotus during activities and he still complained about his pain. I realized that I had an attachment to wanting to change others. I believe that the best way to help other practitioners is to study Fa more together and then share from our hearts openly and sincerely. What they choose is their own business and we can only try to follow the requirements of Dafa.
Benevolent Master is with us and he endures so much for us without any grievances in his heart. How can I have any complaints about other practitioners? They are still extraordinary beings that try to cultivate in Dafa at the most crucial moment of the cosmos´ existence. We can only support eachother with righteous thoughts and compassion in our hearts. Recently I meditated at night and benevolent Master came to me in the image of a Buddha – but not the usual Buddha image. He was shining brightly with tremendous all encompassing power and his facial image shone with perfect symmetry and an unforgettable face expression. It was as if benevolent Master was on fire. Later on a fellow practitioner told me that Master perhaps wanted to hint to me that to become a Buddha one has to go through real fire by suffering tremendous hardships. I will therefore strive my best to fulfill whatever I promised to do in my vows no matter what. These are just my understandings at my limited cultivation level.
Please point out anything inappropriate.